I’m Not Rigid…Rigid Means…

Angela and Molly are info dumping all about rigidity and how it affects everything from day to day life, traveling, work–you know all the things us neurospicy people experience. Listen in as Angela shares how she is flexible when flexibility is the known expectation (like teaching middle school) and how they mistook this for being flexible in general. And Molly shares why she cried over the lack of guacamole at Chipotle. 

The Magic 8 Ball

After talking about the vast differences in search results on Google when searching “rigid thinking,” Angela—did you know that many people call them AJ…you can, too—shares an article that she found helpful in understanding and communicating about cognitive flexibility, or inflexibility in this case. They get into behaviors like:

  • Repetition
  • Challenges with unmet expectations
  • Perfectionism
  • Compulsions
  • Perseveration
  • Obsessions
  • Agitation and/or Aggression
  • Self-Injury
  • Anxiety and/or Depression and/or Suicidality

Guacamole is Not a Game

“You don’t have any guacamole?” Molly (12:15) shares what made them cry for half an hour at Chipotle. “I never order Chipotle without Guacamole!” Food expectations can be a big deal and understanding this makes a huge difference in communicating with your kiddos as well as NDs in your life who have “rigid” food habits. 

And AJ talks about the significant attachment and grief experienced when reading books and playing RPGs (role playing games). “For three hours…I was curled into a ball on the couch with rolls of toilet paper because I could not stop sobbing.” While this sounds ludicrous to some people, for someone who appreciates the consistency of a character in their life as well as has created expectations in their mind for that character, this is a real experience.

Manage Your Expectations

Molly and AJ remind us that understanding one’s own cognitive inflexibilities and how they impact daily life can lead to greater self-awareness and regulation. Furthermore, they remind us that we don’t grow out of our neurodivergence and that the things that helped us regulate when we were children may also help us regulate today and, unless it is harming you, is perfectly okay to continue using as a support. Finally, they remind us that  having this understanding of others in our lives helps create and maintain relationships in all areas of our lives. 


Cognitive Rigidity: The 8-Ball from Hell

Crisis Support